Elizabeth has a class Halloween party tomorrow, and I signed up to bring cupcakes. I signed up to bring cupcakes because I like to bake, and I especially like to bake cute holiday-themed food. I decided on an Ina recipe -- Beatty's chocolate cake. I've made it before with good results. So I stopped at Whole Foods for "good" cocoa powder, per the recipe instructions, and a few other ingredients I needed. I baked the cupcakes. And they were mediocre at best. And worse yet, I couldn't get them out of the pan. I had a serious mess on my hands. I decided to cut my losses, because I did not want to waste my good Callebaut in buttercream for subpar cupcakes for a bunch of 7 year olds. I then made the decision to run to Publix to buy Halloween cupcakes.
E was at soccer practice until 6:30, and I had J and C in the car with me. I looked at the clock and realized that we were pretty tight on time for getting cupcakes and then picking up E on time. So I gave J and C a little lecture: "Okay kids, we need to be a lean, mean cupcake-buying machine. BOOM. Get the cupcakes. BOOM. Get in line. BOOM. Pay for the cupcakes. BOOM. Get back in the car to pick up Elizabeth. We will not get sidetracked. We will not wander off. We will not purchase any other items besides cupcakes. We will not waver from our single, fast cupcake-buying mission. Okay? Okay!"
The kids did exactly what they were supposed to do, but then we got up to the checkout lines, and I immediately got that sinking feeling that comes with knowing that despite your best efforts to purchase cupcakes with military-like speed and precision, you've been thwarted by Publix's "only two checkout lanes open during peak hours" policy. It was 6:19. I knew it would take more than 5 minutes to get through the line, and then we'd be late to pick up E. So I said to the kids: "kids, we have to put back the cupcakes. We don't have time to get through this line. Hurry up! Put back the cupcakes!"
So they did, and we drove off, cupcakeless, to pick up Elizabeth, each of us thinking that we have never seen, and hopefully never again will see, such a spectacular display of incompetence on the cupcake-procurement front. I was going to go back to Publix with the kids after we picked up E, but I decided that cupcakes really did not seem to be in the cards today. I will make a second (third?) attempt tomorrow.